Worries of a mom

When you become a mother “worry” is what comes along with it (mostly self invited). Worrying is a part of motherhood you can’t get rid of, even when your child is 60 and has his/her own kids. The worst part is you can’t get rid of it even if you want to. Worries of a mom are always with her even when she grows old.

A new mom has a lot on her mind about herself, her health etc. and the baby’s as well. I have had a fair share of worries till date. For instance –

1. You get up in the middle of the night to check if your child is breathing or not.

2. You check if your child has had enough milk after he/she is done (sometimes by even weighing them).

3. If he/she stays awake the entire night crying, you can’t figure out what is happening.

4. His/her first cold, vomit, change in the poop colour etc.

5. Too little or too many times pooping or peeing.

6. The first tooth brings a lot of changes.

7. Eating for the first time.

8. Crawling / walking.

9. Falling and hurting.

10. Puking milk after feeding.

The list is long and it will go on as time passes, but the reasons to worry will change with age. The biggest worry of all would be ‘things not happening as you want them to’, meaning you want to do something for your child and it doesn’t go your way. There can be many reasons for this. First the child refuses, second your partner doesn’t support, third your parents and in laws don’t support etc. A mother has to endure these throughout her life. The struggle is real and it makes the journey a little difficult for her. Nevertheless a mother never gives up and keeps trying.

Tough mothers are always alone and fighting for the child’s betterment. People need to understand and be there for mothers who are trying to to be tough. Families don’t support or approve of certain things but they need to see from the mother’s perspective as well. No mother likes scolding, shouting or even punishing her child. If she is doing the same, it is for their better future. Sometimes it is the job of a mother to teach not just the child but the entire family. I learned something from a beautiful ad here. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ppPzROPWyKU

Being tough is not easy, you might think of giving up easily but don’t give up. When I speak to the other mothers who has kids elder to mine they always tell me “worries of a mom never ends, these are not the first and they won’t be the last”. As a matter of fact, this is just the beginning, there is more to come along the way. The faster we accept and adapt the easier it is for a mother to see how she can mold the child.

I was worried about not being a good mother just like every other mom. I would question everything I did and that would start the process of over thinking which leads to worry (without any reason). Even today I worry if what I am doing is right for my child or not, will I be considered a bad person if I make mistakes or be judged by others, will my kid not like me if i treat him/her strictly etc. These worries will go on for life, eventually you learn to live with it I guess.

The best teachers in such cases are our own mother and mother-in-law. They are the ones who never judge you for what you did because they have also been through the same and they know how it feels. The constant support from them and someone to vent out to can make a lot of difference. 

MIL, me & mom

With everything said, the feeling is being a mother is complete when your child comes running to you when you open the door, when he/she is throwing a tantrum, wants to just hug you, wants to share something with you or when the first time he/she says mom etc. The worries of a mom are all set aside for a minute when these things happen.

When you start living with such worries and not forcing them out of your life, a mother’s life is a little better. On a lighter note, I am always ears if you want to vent out your frustration and want to talk about things. For now, I am trying to put my worries to rest and relax with my family in this lockdown. Until next time.

#mother #support #teachers #pumping #mom #journey #breastfeeding #tough #bottle